February Falls Short

Not that we expected you to live up to December or anything.
Basically we are the wrong target market for February. If you're into love or in love, sure, I can see why you find February so seductive. If not, well then join the singles' club. It's fun - you get to save money and go to Cape Town Fish Market and eat half price sushi and judge guys who bring girls to half price sushi on Valentine's Day. Bitch please, if the guy settles for half price sushi on Valentine's Day, this guy is never gonna buy you anything.

What I'm meaning to say is this: Valentine's Day and February in general are about people being bat shit crazy in love, which I'm sure every single person out there wants to be, eventually. So, lovers, please don't mind me when I say I love being alone, I don't care about these pink shitty hearts floating around in shop windows. What I'm trying to say is I probably care more about not celebrating Valentine's Day than you couples do celebrating it. I think I speak for a lot of single people out there.

Whatever. March is two days away. Put away those red and pink everythings.

I hate Sundays

Something tells me I've written this before. Let me say it again. I despise Sundays. To me, Sunday feels like the day before you're given the electric chair treatment, the last day of death row where you get to eat lots of food and have a relative amount of fun. Because bitch, once it's all over you die! Okay, it sounds a little melodramatic, but need I remind you of the uncertain dread associated with the first day of the work week. Suddenly it's Sunday evening and you're either rich and have DSTV and apparently watching Idols, or you're us who watch anything from wrestling to that Afrikaans show filled with psychotic, colourfully dressed people who laugh and celebrate EVERYTHING. An example : "Oh my God you guys, Vince just sold his 346th sandwich this morning. Meet us at Cherry on the Top (cocktail bar). Let's celebrate. Don't forget to invite you 87 year old neighbour, that wench never misses a party in the Laan (avenue)." To those who don't know which show I'm referring to, consider yourselves lucky. To everyone else, fuck, this shit kills! I digress. So there you are, sitting on the couch, after an entire relatively light hearted afternoon and it hits you like you are Britney Spears - one more time. Tomorrow is Monday which means wake up early, get ready, get ready to sit in traffic, get ready to sit in traffic some more, arrive at work, read email, write email, go to meeting, after meeting, after meeting, then have 3 hours left to do actual work. Times 5.

It took me such a long time to come to this potential solution - potential, because I've never really had a reason to go out on a Sunday, ex-boyfriends are in-house entertainment enough. And potential because I see my friends doing it and they seem to be having fun and not getting demoted at work because they didn't spend their entire weekend working or trying to solve work related problems that haven't even fucking arisen yet. So yes, from next Sunday onwards, I'll be going out, spending my days with actual (gasp) people and places and shop in real life and not online. And not worry about Monday and his 4 other shit-face friends. Yes, I'll be doing all of that.

But in the mean time, excuse me while I worry myself to death about the week ahead and give myself an aneurysm in the process.

Oh, and here are some depressing shit to look at. My pleasure.

Anywhere but here

Then and Now

So, this photographer, created this awesome project called "Back to The Future". You can check it out here

The joys of fashion advertising

I get to use the word "jeggings", "cardi", "chunky knit" and "winter wardrobe warmers" without feeling like a complete Cosmo whore.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Welcome Back Radiohead

What else can I say? Except maybe, Yesss!

Thanks flow chart now I know why my friends are the way they are.

Hello My Preciousss

Meet me at Cape Town Fish Market so we can judge each other

So, for the past few months, or since I have gotten myself this card (ohmygod, everyone should have this card, because now, even the poor can eat sushi and feel like the rich, even though it's only on Tuesdays, or Mondays if you and your homies like hanging at Cresta, which is awesome if you're a 15 to 16 year old and so totally into sk8ers or if you're us, 25 year olds who happen to live nearby and are in a constant battle with money or similar and would like to judge each other after work on Monday evenings or just sit and stare at the conveyor belt and feel so fucking happy in the moment. Yes it's the small things in life) my homegirl (I call her that because we share a home and she's into hip-hop apparently, and she's a girl) and myself like to go to the CTFM every Monday or Tuesday or both. Basically, we feel so very Cosmo on these nights, because we get to sit around a conveyor belt after work and bitch and moan and judge people and each other on various levels i.e social lives, or lack thereof; work, or lack thereof; money, or lack thereof; boyfriends, or lack thereof; tact, or lack thereof you get the picture.

I guess this post has no groundbreaking life lesson or big idea, and you're wasting your time reading this... Okay, basically what I'm trying to say is that CTFM has borderline decent sushi which won't give you food poisoning and you can eat shit loads of sashimi and not be absolutely poor for the rest of the month. I guess the last sentence validates this post.

Like Howzit.

This past weekend I relived a few of my favourite things. Not the kind of things like in The Sound Of Music, no. These are more along the line of things like Nirvana, the full moon, insomnia, dancing, swimming, giggling and briefly looking at my life. This diagram pretty much sums it up. This is how simple life can be. Now, can it please be weekend again?

Meet me at Cape Town Fish Market so we can judge each other

So, for the past few months, or since I have gotten myself this card (ohmygod, everyone should have this card, because now, even the poor can eat sushi and feel like the rich, even though it's only on Tuesdays, or Mondays if you and your homies like hanging at Cresta, which is awesome if you're a 15 to 16 year old and so totally into sk8ers or if you're us, 25 year olds who happen to live nearby and are in a constant battle with money or similar and would like to judge each other after work on Monday evenings or just sit and stare at the conveyor belt and feel so fucking happy in the moment. Yes it's the small things in life) my homegirl (I call her that because we share a home and she's into hip-hop apparently, and she's a girl) and myself like to go to the CTFM every Monday or Tuesday or both. Basically, we feel so very Cosmo on these nights, because we get to sit around a conveyor belt after work and bitch and moan and judge people and each other on various levels i.e social lives, or lack thereof; work, or lack thereof; money, or lack thereof; boyfriends, or lack thereof; tact, or lack thereof you get the picture.

I guess this post has no groundbreaking life lesson or big idea, and you're wasting your time reading this... Okay, basically what I'm trying to say is that CTFM has borderline decent sushi which won't give you food poisoning and you can eat shit loads of sashimi and not be absolutely poor for the rest of the month. I guess the last sentence validates this post.

Flip, like hello blog, it's been a while, you bitch. Love, Elizma

And I have a lot to say, really, since I've last posted I have gathered a shit load of opinions and I can go beyond, but I have to work. Yes. On a Sunday, also I had my frontal brain lobes removed, completely against my will, but there you have it. Now, you can look at pretty pictures of pretty rings. Damnit, McQueen, I wish my frontal brain lobe-less brain shone like your works of art.

And in case we ever date, or you want to propose and get married, here's Alexander McQueen's website. http://www.alexandermcqueen.com/

I do.