Not that we expected you to live up to December or anything.
Basically we are the wrong target market for February. If you're into love or in love, sure, I can see why you find February so seductive. If not, well then join the singles' club. It's fun - you get to save money and go to Cape Town Fish Market and eat half price sushi and judge guys who bring girls to half price sushi on Valentine's Day. Bitch please, if the guy settles for half price sushi on Valentine's Day, this guy is never gonna buy you anything.
What I'm meaning to say is this: Valentine's Day and February in general are about people being bat shit crazy in love, which I'm sure every single person out there wants to be, eventually. So, lovers, please don't mind me when I say I love being alone, I don't care about these pink shitty hearts floating around in shop windows. What I'm trying to say is I probably care more about not celebrating Valentine's Day than you couples do celebrating it. I think I speak for a lot of single people out there.
Whatever. March is two days away. Put away those red and pink everythings.
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